Stump For Me. Please?

Courtesy of Tosh.0, I give you the following advertisement:

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This guy graduated from high school in ’76 but went to college starting in ’74.  But, then he didn’t get out of college until ’84.  Can somebody explain that to me?  As for the experience, that reinforces the  notion that I need to run for office.  My ad would say:

Prior Government Experience:  Perfect Attendance Award in 3rd grade.  Winner of Mrs. Salassi’s 6th grade spelling bee.  Voted “Most Likely To” in an informal poll of 9th graders.  

Statement:  

 To My Friends, My Family and My Kids:

 Oh, and my wife.  I think that covers everybody.  I’m running for this government position because I think we can all agree that Washington has gone too far left.  If it gets any further, it will be Maryland.  And that is unacceptable.

 Those rich big-wigs are ruining our country and making lots of money doing it.  Now I ask you for my chance.  You have to remember that I couldn’t be as bad as the incumbent.  Or even the guy that’s there now.

 To paraphrase somebody that I think was actually President at one time:  “The only thing we have to fear is clowns.”  And, believe me.  I’m no clown.  So, if you elect me to this position,  I promise to continue my record of perfect attendance and fenominal spelling.  

 My door is always open.  But, I hope to get that fixed using a little ole’ taxpayer subsidy kinda stuck in a bill that has to do with the economy.  God bless America.

I start taking donations now.  No amount is too big.

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