Datsuns Don’t Float

I was reading one of those free classified ad papers in northwest Florida last week and I saw tons of ads dealing with cars that were flooded:

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Huh?  Is that a big problem for people in northwest Florida?  Your car getting freaking flooded?  Really? If we’re talking the family and friends of Noah, then OK.  Oh, and Atlantis. I’ll grant you that they had an issue with flooding.  And they were big into automobiles, so there’s a demand.  In fact, Noah was “this close” to building an SUV 300 cubits by 50 cubits, but union workers made that damn near impossible.  And combined with import fees to ancient Mesopotamia, it just wasn’t cost effective.  So he went with an ark.  But northwest Florida?

And one of the ads has a car with some stupid SOB sitting on the trunk surrounded by what appears to be Lake Erie.  Apparently this flood took him completely by surprise.  Otherwise, why are his lights on and how did he get on the car trunk?  Hey, rocks-for-brains, the value of that 1974 Datsun completely depends on how much gas is in the tank.  Walk away and leave it there.  You’re welcome.

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